Stop the boobing babe

Establishing breastfeeding is difficult and for some, impossible. For my first this was true. So I had ruminated from the get go about how to get going with feeding my second. I know the agony and heartache of never managing to breastfeed. So every day I was thankful that I could breastfeed D and I never took it for granted. I know I was one of the lucky ones, despite my problems. However, when the time came to wean my wean [pronounce in thick scots], I was flummoxed.

Due to my milk oversupply, D had received a bottle of breastmilk over night from week one. But I got lazy and as my milk supply normalised, the bottle feed dropped off. So by three months, he would only take boob. I had set a target, try and feed to six months. But the target was approaching and fast. At six months we started to reintroduce the bottle. My boy flatly refused it. He wouldn’t even let it near his mouth. He screamed and arched away. If I managed to catch him in a good mood, he would occasionally chew the teat, but NEVER sucked.

Secretly I felt validated by his bottle refusal. He needed me, and only me. I had never had this with my first and now I had it. However, by the time he was nine months and still refusing a bottle, I was beginning to get a little panicked. I now just wanted my body back. I was still leaking, still needing breast pads 24/7, still getting bouts of mastitis; not feeling myself. Not to mention returning to work…

He was eating three square meals a day, leading to his ever increasing round belly. As we say up north, he was (and still is) a pie. The bottle trials were becoming more and more elaborate. We tried formula, breastmilk, and cow’s milk (I know). We tried numerous bottle brands, sippy cups, straws even spoon feeding. We tried feeding when he was starving, to when he had just eaten. We tried dream feeds, morning feeds and milk with lunch.

Nothing worked. He loved boob.

Out of despair I phoned the health visitor. At first, she tried to pursued me to continue feeding. With a frowny face that only my boys could see, I explained about work, and that frankly by this point, I was done. I needed to stop for myself.

Her advice was simple:

1.       Mix milk into everything

2.      Give him vitamin D

So his food started to take on the form of something out the Matrix. It was all slightly grey looking, watery, like papier-mâché. He had babyrice four times a day, his favourite yogert was watered down with milk. Cottage pie came with milk, custard with milk, mashed banana, with milk. I used formula milk, to try and get him used to the taste.

By this time I had reduced my feeds down to once a day, and because I was still ‘block feeding’, this meant I fed off one boob every 48 hours.

One morning, about 7 days before Christmas, I went cold turkey. I gave my last feed, although at the time, I hadn’t quite realised. I thought, let’s just see what happens.

My boy is a chip off the old block, and so what happened was a real Christmas treat. We had a five day Mexican standoff. He refused to take a bottle and I refused to take out a boob. So for five days he had no solo milk intake.

Then a Christmas miracle happened, he took 100ml of formula, out of a bottle. Something which I had tried everyday. The next day, he drank formula twice. I held my breath with every suck. Thinking he was going to fling himself to the ground in protest, but he didn’t. And by the new year he was drinking milk out of a bottle as if he had never had it any other way.

I know dropping the boobing is something that other mamas have struggled with. And I really feel there is no right way. But I do think there are some tricks we can share with each other that will help. My top tips are:

1.       Check out our advice page on stopping breastfeeding.

2.      Make sure they are eating plenty to maintain their nutritional intake and follow the guidelines on vitamin D intake

3.       Speak to a professional, my health visitor gave me the reassurance I needed that if I was going to stop feeding, D would cope.

4.       Mix milk into everything.

5.       Try a bottle everyday. Get different people trying, at different times, with different milks, at different temperatures.

6.       Revisit things that haven’t worked before, they might work again.

7.       Try and relax. My baby went for 5 days without milk in a bottle. His nappies were wet, he was still eating and drinking water. He was well within himself.

We would love to hear what worked for you. Perhaps you could tell us your drop the boob story, or just drop us a line with tips.