Pen Pal: Breastfeeding beyond two
I wrote a blog 4 years ago about my daughter, Delilah, who suffered with cows milk protein allergy, and our breastfeeding journey. When she was two and a half we started on the milk ladder, and later that year the egg ladder and by the age of 3 she had outgrown both!
Around this time we had our second child, Chester, who I was so excited to start our feeding journey with. Although more of a natural feeder than Delilah, he did have severe reflux for a year. People kept telling me:
“Breastfed babies don’t get reflux”
I’d reply:
“Come and see my carpet and my clothes then” !
Around age 1 he finally grew out of it.... much to our relief. To my surprise however, he didn't grow out of feeding. Our feeding journey continues at age 30 months. I never thought I’d be feeding a toddler who could use words to ask for milk “want more ‘ta’ with mummy” is how he asks... but it just seemed to happen without us realising.
So now, at age 2.5 Chester feeds between 2 and 5 times a day, although more recently it seems to be “more ta” every time my bottom hits the sofa! If I’m with him he has it, if I’m not he doesn’t, even when staying over night away (pre-lockdown times). He still wakes once a night for a feed on a normal night but I’m literally only up for 5-10 mins then back to sleep.
I love how it gives us close time - he’s a very cuddly boy so he seems to really enjoy the closeness (and I love it too!). I feel peace of mind that he’s still getting a decent amount of nutrition because despite weaning him in exactly the same way as Delilah, he’s never been a good eater and pretty much lives off cheese wrap, fruit and yoghurt (I know, it could be worse!).
Being a part of extended breastfeeding communities on Facebook was really encouraging and helped to normalise the situation. I don’t know anyone personally who has fed this long. It’s wonderful that my family and friends don’t really even bat an eyelid (although the crazy global pandemic and lockdowns probably means many people don’t even know). Maybe soon I’ll think about chatting to Chester about having less mummy milky, but truth is I really have no clue how he won’t be asking for ‘ta’ in the playground when he starts school!
So this is our next challenge, how on earth will we stop? I’m totally dumbfounded about this. I’ve heard people say reduce a feed at a time, but it doesn’t work like that feeding a toddler. He doesn’t “need” it like a baby does. He’s very much attached to it and it’s a part of his normal life. I did try to stop last year, when I went away for 4 days, but the second I got back and sat down with him he was straight into asking and I couldn’t bring myself to say it’s all gone now. So for now this is us.
